Tuesday, January 10, 2012

In My Castle I'm the Effing KING... Which is why you probably shouldn't spout bigoted nonsense until *After* you're off of my property.

I've been told by very reliable sources that I am kind and tolerant (these same sources also say that I am nine types of crazy) but even I occasionally lose my shit. Remember sis in law who is suuuuuper ditzy? Well, her brain to mouth filter is broken (or maybe her brain is just broken) and from time to time some really offensive stuff falls out of her mouth. I've been struggling with this for a while, because I don't wanna like... correct her... or something lest it crush her soul. I don't really wanna just sit there and thus encourage her to spout ignorant idiocy either. Just as I was straddling the fence on this delicate issue, she deigned it necessary to offer me some parenting advice. She has no children.

At first I thought it was sort of sweet... but she wouldn't shut up. What started it me mentioning in passing how my daughter is a really light sleeper. Sis in law said something along the lines of "Oh, well if you don't get them used to noise when they are really tiny then that probably makes them light sleepers." That may or may not be accurate, and I said as much and followed it with the following, "But I used to hold Ayla while I cleaned, have her sleep on the couch with the TV on and she slept in our room with Anthony snoring for like 7 months... It isn't really that she was never exposed to a lot of noise, she just reached a point where she became unable to sleep through a lot of noises."

It didn't end there. She wouldn't let it go. She insisted that I had not done a good enough job of "getting her used" to noises and then went on to suggest that I be noisy when she is trying to sleep so that she'll learn to sleep with noises going on. I tried to laugh it off, but she just kept repeating that shit over and over until I had to physically remove myself from the room. No amount of reason gets through to this person. Critical thinking escapes her entirely. Couple that with a complete lack of knowledge of how babies and toddlers develop and you have what I was up against. I am not often in situations where my own critical thinking and reasoning ability don't lend themselves to a resolution, so you can imagine my distress.

How I wish the evening had just ended there. But no. She then chose to go on a tangent about Muslims. I wish I were making this up. Apparently, a friend of hers read somewhere that they just kill each other all the time and that they read in the Quran somewhere that killing infidels is good. It still didn't end there. We own a copy of the Quran, we have many books on religion, and I asked her if she would like to borrow it. She looked horrified. I guess looking in the holy book of another religion turn Catholics into pumpkins or something? I tried to explain to her what Islam actually was, and gave her an abundance of examples of how it and Christianity are similar, as well as very bluntly stating that extremists in every religion (including Catholicism) have done some atrocious things to others. Again, she wouldn't let it go. Her entire argument was "Something I saw on TV once" and "Something my friend read" and we just couldn't get around it.

I was fucking furious. Who the hell comes into another person's home, gives them parenting advice, spouts stupid ignorant nonsense about a belief system they admittedly don't understand and then refuse to hear any damned reason?! It's like she is completely deaf to educated arguments! (I would make a Republican joke, but I don't want to be too offensive.)

This all may seem like a small thing to others, but to me it truly is the straw that broke the camels back. I've made a decision that if given a choice, I will opt to not be in her company, even if it means removing myself and my daughter from our home while she is over. I certainly do not want her to be an influence in our children's lives. Anyone who is that close minded and intentionally ignorant has no place around my children. I know. It sounds really harsh. I am adamant that our children not be raised in a bubble and that they learn as much about as many things as they can. I feel that being around intentionally ignorant people will only serve to frustrate them as well as stunt them when they are younger.

Sorry. This has been more of a rant than an actual post. I promise I'll get back to posting funny shit soon. This was just really bothering me and making me crazy. You know how it is.